JERRY WONG PLEASE UPDATE

It was this foggy in Melbourne a few nights ago. The red light there belongs to the hardly visible building in the background.

In other news,

- The gunman surrendered to the police by himself.
- Winter Camp next week.
- Hillsong Conference '07 in Sydney, two more weeks!
- Phantom of the Opera musical, two and a half months away!
- And,

Josh Groban, I can't wait!! It's too early to feel excited yet, but I'm happy. I was debating with myself whether to go or not, but decided that I love his music (and him) too much to pass up this opportunity to catch him live in concert.

Connie is happy.

Too Close for Comfort

Living in Melbourne and all, I knew that life is undoubtedly not as safe as back home in Brunei or in Perth. Some of you might know from news or read from another medium, but shootings took place yesterday morning in the CBD.

The scary part is that the shootings took place barely two streets away from where I'm staying. It's about 10 min walking distance to the scene of the crime. I've passed that way several times before.

The Age still has extensive articles on the shooting, so if you're curious, you can take a read. The gunman is still on the loose, and he might still be in the city or have ran off to the suburbs. Two victims remain in serious condition at the Royal Melbourne Hospital, while a solicitor died from his wounds as a result of being a Good Samaritan. One of the victims was just an innocent bystander, a Dutch backpacker. It's tragic. The man who fired the rounds has a criminal past and is a bikie.

It's scary because my housemate related to me that she would have been on the very same scene (the corner of William Street and Flinders Lane) had she had an exam yesterday morning, at the exact same time, because she would have to pass that way to go for her exam.

We stay on Degraves Street. After Degraves is Elizabeth St., then Queen St., then William St. Perpendicular to Degraves is Flinders Lane.

I was still sleeping when she heard the news, through my other housemate who had went out earlier that morning to study in the uni library. We were advised not to go out. From the news on TV, you can see that the city streets were deserted, an almost alien scene for what would usually be a bustling, lively Monday morning in the city, as the police cordoned off streets. It's almost surreal. We went out later in the evening to run some errands. Roads were already reopened, and the city was back to normal - as normal as could be.

Today, the suspect's car was found just around the corner of Flinders Lane and Elizabeth St.; the suspect and his victim have been ascertained to have stayed at a hotel on Flinders Lane itself.

It's all too close to home, and too close for comfort. Let's pray that the gunman will be apprehended soon.

These are the days of wine and roses.

It's been often said that time seems to speed up in times of mirth and happiness but a minute seems a day when there appear to be nothing but sorrow and weeping in our days. But these moments pass, and while some may leave significant scars or memories, "they are not long".

I may not be a sage or a wise old woman who has seen and experienced much in her long, colourful life, but when I think about the future ahead of me, I wonder if I will be content. Will I be married to a loving husband, with kids and a successful career? Will I even get married? Where would I be? Will my friends still remain the same? Will I be who I am now? Or will I have changed into another person unrecognizable by myself?

I want to cherish my years now. This moment, now, it is precious. Cliche as it is, time, once gone, can never be had again. Everyday is a new gift from God; His mercies are new every morning. Because once you get into the working world, it'll be harder.

Ever since I decided that Music is my path, I've been haunted by doubts and fears about this road I have chosen to travel down. Passing my DipABRSM played a major role in it - I don't usually struck bargains with God, but at that point in time, I knew I was very unprepared for my exam, and that it would take a miracle for me to pass. But pass I did - and I knew then, that God was still by my side, holding my hand and guiding me down this road. I still do not know if Music is a career - or a calling, but the mere fact that I passed by a few marks was a confirmation from God. Because considering the lack of practice and commitment I had put into passing my exam, it was truly a miracle.

But still I doubted, and I actually started out my first year in uni rejecting my confirmed enrolment in Music, and switching to Arts; and immediately I regretted what I had done. Three weeks into the new semester, I did what I could to turn around my mistake, and thank God that I was able to go down this path.

People. Whether we like it or not, we are judgmental by nature, in some way or another. More so, I would think, especially in the Asian society. "Oh, so you're in university now? What course are you doing?" is an inevitable question I face whenever I go back. "Music/Arts," is my reply. A surprised look and a seemingly forced laugh. "Music? What are you going to be? A teacher?" More laughter.

In truth, I hate it. I hate it when they do that. I may not be on my way to becoming a doctor who saves lives, or an engineer or an architect. Or a pharmacist or some amazing profession, but this is what I have chosen. I don't need to see your surprise or that 'pity' at my decision. I know what they're thinking: Why are you going down this path?? I know that I could be doing something better, something more - "professional", which would ensure me a more financially secured future, but this is my passion. This is what I have decided.

It's hard especially when I see everyone around me going down such respectable paths and on their ways to become budding lawyers, doctors, dentists, pharmacists, etc. It's hard knowing that I could have gone down that path as well.

But this is my choice. There's no turning back from here.

...

They are not long, the days of wine and roses:
Out of a misty dream
Our path emerges for a while, then closes
Within a dream.

The Days of Wine and Roses

Vitae Summa Brevis Spem Nos Vetat Incohare Longam
Ernest Dowson

They are not long, the weeping and the laughter,
Love and desire and hate:
I think they have no portion in us after
We pass the gate.

They are not long, the days of wine and roses:
Out of a misty dream
Our path emerges for a while, then closes
Within a dream.



*The Latin title translated means "The brief sum of life forbids us the hope of enduring long". It's from Horace's Ode 1 (Carminum liber primus). Horace is the same Roman lyric poet who gave us the phrase "carpe diem". Just felt like sharing this short poem I found. The melancholic tone and brevity of it appealed to me very much.

Holidays!

Jerry: no, I'm not going back to Brunei.. =( Partly because I was back home a few weeks ago, and it's a bit ridiculous to return home again so soon when I've barely been back here a month. I initially thought I might have returned in June/July to do my PR stuff instead, but that plan went "poof" when I went back in May suddenly.

Exams are over!!

A hundred arrows are pointed at me, and my housemates would just kill me, but I'll say it anyway: My dilemma now is to find something to do! Haha.

Oh well. I've got about 3 weeks of holidays, before going off for Winter Camp and then it's off to the Hillsong Conference in July for me! My housemate managed to help me find a cheaper ticket for the Conference, and it was from another friend in the fellowship, and she had signed up for the Worship Leading stream. So that's what I would be going for I think... I thought that if I couldn't get a cheaper ticket from someone who's not going, then I might have chosen the Musician stream instead if I bought my own ticket, but I might gain something from learning a few things about worship leading.

I had wanted to look for a job or something, but I doubt anyone would want to hire me for only three weeks since I'll be gone for about two weeks or so... I guess I might look for a job after I come back from the Conference.

Sigh. Still trying to get over the depression of the practical exam I had yesterday. Anyway, I dropped by the CD store while walking home to buy a movie to watch - Roman Holiday, featuring Audrey Hepburn, who won the Academy Award for Best Actress for her role in the film. I've been getting into the classics lately - I've bought and watched Casablanca and Gone with the Wind, rented and watched My Fair Lady and watched Breakfast At Tiffany's at a friend's place... it's kind of refreshing to watch these old movies - their acting so fresh, and real. None of that Hollywood nonsense you see nowadays... I mean, there are good movies, but it's not like how they used to make it anymore.

Anyway.

Have fun in Brunei, Jerry! And for goodness' sake, please post something!

Gaaarhhh

So like... Jerry, you're back in Brunei!! Update, update, update!! (Honestly!!)


I love Shakespeare and all, but trying to finish up my 50% essay is killing me. No, it's the referencing and footnotings which are killing me. I hateeee footnoting and having to reference everything. Why can't we just write essays as we did back in high school? I know, I know, plagiarism and all that stuff, but for once, I'm really tempted to just say, who careeeess!!

My exam timetable isn't as bad as compared to my other friends', since I'll be done with everything by Wednesday afternoon - but this one time, I actually wish my practical exam was later. With sciences and stuff like that, you can cram, but you absolutely cannot cram practicing and learning the notes for your practical exam. (Please, God, just let me pass!)

I really ought to be finishing my essay, but I'm ranting to Ern online and creating this alternate universe where... Okay, I should stop before I start ranting here as well. Gah.

I'm totally looking forward to de-stressing after exams. But only if the idea of facing my results will disappear from my consciousness first. If anything kills the joy of holidays, it's that.